


Unspoken desire, holy sin

by Wild_Quetzal



Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Chubby Aziraphale (Good Omens), Dorks in Love, F/F, F/M, First Time, Fluff, Genderswap, Light Angst, M/M, Non-Explicit Sex, Other, Post-Apocalypse, Protective Crowley (Good Omens), Tenderness, Transformation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-02
Updated: 2019-08-02
Packaged: 2020-07-29 15:44:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,634
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20084701
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wild_Quetzal/pseuds/Wild_Quetzal
Summary: Aziraphale just messed up, Crowley is angry with him and he needs to apologize. It's a shame he couldn't tell him about his indecent carnal desires before the accident. A gift would be nice as an apology, that and... maybe a little change in his body wouldn't hurt, he wonders what Crowley will think about this femenine form.Just two dramatic idiots loving each other so much.





	Unspoken desire, holy sin

**Author's Note:**

> I considered seriously using they/them pronouns but I will use he/him 'cause these are their canon pronouns. Even so, I coded Aziraphale more like agender, and Crowley as genderfluid.
> 
> I got inspired by Aziraphale's lovely designe from ShaddyDraws on IG and then I got carried away... I dunno, I just love girls so much.
> 
> [Also, I know like 0.1% of British English so forgive me]  
Hope you enjoy!

"For the love of-" mumbled Aziraphale as he walked down the street "What have I done?". He was certainly not feeling well, in fact, he was so worried and full of regret. He fidgeted as he remembered the events.

Almost an hour ago, he was sitting in the Bentley. Crowley gave him a light and tender kiss in the corner of his lips when he entered. That made him flush intensively. Crowley chuckled as he turned on the car. Aziraphale giggled too. After all, the physical contact between them was still very new for both. Of course, the angel enjoyed those tiny touches and kisses, but deep inside there was a curious need for more.

"So..." Crowley said softly "we're having lunch at that new restaurant, right, Angel?"

"Surely" Smiled Aziraphale as he gave a quick sight of Crowley's black outfit that outlined his slim body. He sighed.  
  
"Something wrong, Angel?"

"Not at all, my dear". The car began to move. Aziraphale didn't want to say anything, not because he felt unsafe or insecure, but because he didn't want to speed up the things. Crowley was putting so much effort in keeping the slow and gentle rhythm of their relationship, always considering those old words Aziraphale once pronounced in this same car. He was so lost in his own thoughts and the constant glances at Crowley's neckline, that he didn't notice the increasing speed of the Bentley. He wanted to get Crowley's attention, so, just to catch his eye, he took one of the Queen's albums. "This never gets old for you, my dear" He said.

"What?" Just a small peek at the album "Queen! Of course not, Angel, for no one I guess, Queen will last forever, you know?" But Aziraphale wanted his eyes on him, on his body, on his face at least. Just a small glance but with coded with endearment, maybe with desire? Of course he was asking for too much in the least indicated place. He insisted anyway.

"Oh, I always forgot the names of the other members besides Freddy, what was the name of this one?"

"Who?" Crowley turned to look. Just a small glance at Aziraphale right before he returned his eyes abruptly to the windshield just in time to move the steering wheel violently in order to not kill a woman crossing the road. Crowley slammed on his brakes. The front of the Bentley crashed into a parked car.

The angel couldn't feel his toes or his knees. All his body was trembling when they opened the door and touched the ground. "Oh my God" He whispered as Crowley was holding his head with his hands dramatically as he realized the damage on both vehicles. The crash wasn't severe, just a small dent. The brake was the thing that shocked them most.

"Angel, are you ok?"

"Crow-" He mumbled, still catching his breath "Crowley, what the heck?!"

"Wha-"

"I've told you a thousand times to not drive that fast, Crowley!" Aziraphale screamed full of fear and an irrational anger.

"But you where the one who-"

"But you where the one driving! And you where going so fast!" His eyes filled with tears "We almost die... Do you really don't care if we discorporate? You know there will be no coming back! Not after all what happened!"

"Of course I don't want to! I'm so-"

"Then why you where going too fast?!"

The demon couldn't handle the effort for being patient for much longer. He frowned. "Well, Aziraphale," He hissed "if you don't like how I drive, maybe you could walk to that bloody restaurant by yourself." He snapped his fingers and the dents vanished.

"Perhaps I will" He said angrier.

"Then go."

"Right."

So there was him. Walking lonelily through the streets of Soho. Hating himself for loosing his mind so badly with the person he loved the most, with the person who he wanted to spend the rest of the eternity. Everything for a damned crash that was actually his fault. Everything for being absurdly horny in the most improper place and situation. He needed to apologize, and he would once he arrived home. In this occasion he didn't want to wait for a long time to talk to Crowley, not now, not with this recent new step in their relationship. The apologize was a necessity.

Aziraphale eventually got distracted in the many many memories he had of his demon through the eras. He definitely didn't want to loose that, at least not for a dumb mistake like this one. While he was walking something got his attention. He stopped abruptly at a showcase of a clothing store for women. Back the cristal, there was a stunning sheath dress. The dark silk was crossed by a delicate golden zipper from the neckline to the bottom of the skirt. The image of the days back at Warlock's house appeared into his mind with the loving image of Crowley wearing those black dresses. He never got the chance, or the courage, to tell him how nice he looked. Of course, the nanny's clothes never were that kinda revealing as this dress, it covered almost half of the thighs. Even so, Aziraphale felt that Crowley would like it. Crowley always liked to play with his appearance, that included his body and, of course, hair and clothes; he really enjoyed experiencing all the human aspects in this sense. Although... Aziraphale wondered how this garment would look on his beloved demon. Maybe a gift would be a nice topping for the apologize.

Without thinking it too much he entered the shop. Some of the women who were inside, looked at him, some with curiosity, some with a surprised disapproval. Startled by all of the sudden attention, he left rapidly. He really didn't want anyone to feel uncomfortable because of him. Surely, he wished the strange and useless gender norms didn't ever existed so he could enter casually to the shop and anybody could feel attacked, or anybody could judge him for entering into a women's clothing shop, but, sadly, vanishing those ideas would take more than one miracle to eradicate. He still had another option.

Contrarily to Crowley's experience, Aziraphale barely experimented with his body or presentation through the centuries. And not because he felt any sort of attachment to the masculine gender or to the men's looks, in fact he didn't felt gender at all, but he liked being comfortable. Staying with his masculine presentation didn't require effort to think about what he would like to look each day, or each year. Only for counted angel's duties purposes he changed his usual presentation into a feminine one, and it was good, but, again, his interaction with sudden changes always were difficult for him (_also, that's why his clothes were kinda antiquated_). But perhaps that was a fairly good option for this situation.

He ran into a telephone box and he lent a fluid and warm miracle navigate his body as he shifted into a more typically feminine form. Good thing this morning he decided to wear a sweater instead of his usual waistcoat, because when a nice weight arrived at his upper chest, he felt how a button of his shirt popped off.

The bell from the shop rang as he entered. This time the sights remained neutral, only an attendant went into his encounter.

"Good afternoon, ma'am," she said "can I help you with something?"

"Actually, yes" He answered with a softer voice than usual "I'm looking for the black dress in the showcase."

The young lady guided him to the dresses of the showcase model. When you maintain a friendship for a couple of millennia, and specially if you're in love with your friend, it's quite sure you'll eventually memorize the figure of your loved one. Choosing the perfect size wasn't really a challenge for Aziraphale.

"Sorry, ma'am, but I think you could need another size"

"Oh, no, it isn't for me." He laughed.

"Oh!" The girl blushed "I see, forgive me. Is it for a friend?"

"Oh-uh well he-she is more like- you know..." He stuttered. Now both were blushed "Anyway! I'll take it."

"Of course! You can pay this way."

Aziraphale followed the attendant across the shop filled with multiple clothes of different styles. At the middle of the way, he found his reflection on a large mirror. There was him. The way his curly hair rested over his shoulders, the curves of his body. The image sort of liked him. Since when he became more aware of the body shapes? Since Crowley turned on a certain desire for him? Could be, but certainly he still wasn't paying so much attention to his own body. Since Gabriel told him to loose the gut? Perhaps, but that wasn't so bad actually. The soft curve of his tummy fitted kinda well with his whole image, at least he hoped so. He wondered what Crowley would think. And he went back to his way.

"Wait!" He said just one moment before paying the precious dark dress "Let me just-"  
Without knowing exactly what he was doing, he cautiously got closer to a tawny skirt. The flowery lace that covered the smooth cloth and the broad knotted ribbon as a manner of belt got his attention almost instantaneously. The skirt was far more casual than the dark dress, but, at the same time there was something elegant in it. Or maybe it was just cute and the angel was just trying to find a way to fit it in his standards.

"Do you like it?" The assistant asked "It's one of the new midi skirts that just arrived. I assure you that it will like you more if you try it on."

That wouldn't hurt, right? The young woman gave him two blouses to try on with the skirt, one more revealing than the other. He just chose one of them: the chiffon fabric one with the rounded collar. And the attire fitted perfectly, as if it was made just for him. He couldn't contain a smile when he looked how the wide skirt balanced till his knees. He didn't loved the clothes isolated, he loved how these looked on him, on his soft and pretty body.

"I will take this couple too, please."

* * *

All Aziraphale could think of was about giving a surprise to Crowley. There wasn't space on his mind to even think about the light pain on his feet for walking for several streets back to the bookshop. He could have gotten a taxi, but walking was his sort of penance of being that mean with Crowley, at least in his mind. He rested for a couple of minutes while he waited for the proper words to come to his mind so his demon could forgive him. What if he was way too angry that he denied talking to him? That wouldn't happen, right?

The phone rang twice. He knew it was Crowley. The shaky hands managed to hold the phone. He heard the demon's voice.

"Angel? Angel, are you there?" He said softly.

"Yes, I am- I am sor-"

"Who? Aziraphale? Is that you?" He interrupted.

"My dear!" The angel couldn't contain himself anymore "I am so sorry! Everything was my fault and you didn't deserve-!"

"Angel, don't- Look, it was also my fault, ok? I wanted to make it up for you, so I bought some cake and we could also drink tea or coffee... if you want I can go to your place, or you could come to mine, or-"

"Yes! I'll go to your place! Thank you, my dear, you really didn't needed to... but I really appreciate it because I'm starving." Crowley chuckled and Aziraphale found a bit of relief "See you soon."

Quickly, the angel put on his new clothes and miracled a half ponytail in his hair. He took the special gift and went away. The feeling of the wind touching the bare skin of his legs was new and delightful. Also, this time he did get a taxi.

* * *

  
Crowley put the kettle and the cups in the table. Everything was ready. He also considered drinking wine, but, after what happened, he wanted something calmed and warm, just like his angel. What were those repeated glances back at the Bentley before the crash? As if he couldn't feel the weight of those blue eyes. Not that those were new in any sense, but these where more insistent. What does he wanted... does he...?

The door bell sounded twice. Why didn't he just come in? Right, Aziraphale must be upset. Poor angel. Anyways, he acted really bitchy a couple hours ago, however so do him.

He opened the door without hesitation. Crowley got really surprised when he saw a lovely lady in front of him. Shining blond hair, deep blue eyes, silken pink lips. Of course he recognized Aziraphale, it was just he wasn't expecting to see him like _this_. Crowley felt the heat in his cheeks when he saw the skirt's ribbon surrounding the angel's waist.

"May I come in?" He hesitated.

"Wha- Oh! Yeah!"

Aziraphale entered awkwardly as he realized the way Crowley was watching him. He really hoped looking as good as he felt a couple of minutes ago, it was too late to change a thing. They stared at each other for a little while without saying anything. Both of them were only getting more and more nervous for no reason.

"Crowley," he began "I-I'm really sorry, my dear. Everything was my fault, I was the one who distracted you. Besides I should have never shouted you like I did..."

"Angel," he said as he got closer to the angel and gently put his hand over his cheek "it's ok, I shouldn't have told you to leave either..."

"I deserved it..."  
  
"Of course not, Angel! You just were scared."

"Yes, I was" he ducked his head "Or maybe I am all the time!" Crowley's fingers got wet because of the tears "I'm so afraid of loosing you! What if heaven or hell try to get us apart again? Or what if I ruin it all with my sodding mouth like today?"

"Angel, that's not gonna happen, we'll always have each other to fix it up."

"I-I'm just so disappointed that I'm never able to protect you like you always do with me, and it's worse because I was the one who put you in danger!" He jumped into the demons arms and surrounded the slim waist with his own "Please, believe me, my dear!" He cried "I just want the person I most love to be safe!"

Crowley lightly squeezed Aziraphale's body. "Angel, remember the very first rain?" The angel nodded "You covered me with your wing although you had just met me. You've always protected me since the very beginning, don't you?"

"Yes..."

"And I know it isn't because you're an angel and caring is what angels do," He searched for his chin and made him to look into his golden eyes "I know it's 'cause you care about me, just the way I care about you, I know it's because you love me."

Aziraphale giggled.

"What?" He murmured "I don't even like you."

"You do." Crowley said with a smirk right before he kissed the angel as if those lips were made of petals.

The kiss ended too soon. Even so, the angel couldn't help but to smile.

"Don't you want to taste the cake I bought you?"

"Obviously I want to, my dear boy."

  
The fluffy cake covered in a generous layer of chocolate cream melted in Aziraphale's mouth. The taste of the dessert wasn't the only thing that was delighting the angel.

Crowley just took one sip of tea before dedicating completely to watch Aziraphale. He was utterly fascinated. The joy and attraction to the angel was something almost as old as their unusual friendship, that wasn't the difference. The demon always enjoyed, perhaps in overdose, watching the angel's face, his neck, his body, that's why he used to circle him from time to time. Did he fantasize with the touch of that soft skin? Definitely. But that was something he learned to control and hide. The least thing that Crowley wanted was to, again, scare him away. Everything needed to move slowly and eventually they would get that intimacy, but there was no hurry, not as long as they were together. And now that both proclaimed their true feelings, the demon was happier than ever.

But the insistent glances of Aziraphale at the Bentley where disturbing his focused thoughts. What if he wanted that kind of intimacy too? If that was the case, he wouldn't admit it, right? _That_ was the difference. And then Aziraphale arrived with a completely changed look in all aspects. Crowley was amused. This time differentiate from the possession of Madame Tracy because now it was truly and only the angel. He recognized all his manners, his gestures. The way he opened his mouth to take another bite of the delicious cake, how his cheeks moved slowly as he chewed, the tiny tremble in his neck as he swallowed. Crowley wished he was that cake so he could provoke such a pleased smile as the one in Aziraphale's face every time he licked him.

And there were those bloody beautiful clothes. The vaporous blouse, the lovely skirt. Every inch of the fabric remarked all those holy curves from his body, including that dreamy new curve in his chest that continually moved with the breath. Crowley desired so badly to let his fingers plunge into the angel's softness. Aziraphale ate another bite and the demon peeked briefly the tip of his damp tongue.

Crowley got closer. Aziraphale shivered. The demons fingers began to play with the silky hair, tangling around the blond curls.

"I must say, angel," He said as he lend his hand give a brief and gentle touch to the angel's arm "that you look stunning."

Aziraphale felt his face burn. His hands started trembling. This was what he wanted, but he didn't really found any accurate words to answer or any other way to react, so he said the first frase that he could think of.

"D-Don't you want to taste?"

Crowley felt his chest melted. Before his lips could touch the angel's skin, Aziraphale backed him away with a tiny fork holding a piece of cake. Evidently, he was referring to the cake. Crowley took away the fork and, instead of eating it, he spread the dessert onto the blond lady's pale cheek with a barely audible hiss. His slick tongue licked the sweet and the warmth of the limp skin, the corner of his lips.

He chuckled a snicker when he saw the petrified expression of the angel.

"I'm sorry, Angel, I won't do that any more, I just wanted to-"

Aziraphale shut him up with a deep kiss. His desperate tongue searched for Crowley's as his beat speed. The demon gave him a light bite when he let his hands slide in the side of his soft waist.

"Actually I did like the cake" He wheezed "But not as much as you" He whispered seductively as his fingers pinched Aziraphale's belly.

"Oh, you, shut up and kiss me" He moaned.

Both exhaled when their mouths touched.

"Wait!" Aziraphale gasped "I almost forgot!"

Crowley stoped immediately.

"What is it, Angel?"

"I brought you a gift."

He gave him a paper bag. And, with a surprised expression, Crowley mumbled "For me?"

"Yes... I-I hope you like it" He fidgeted. The demon opened the bag and felt the silky texture of the fabric. "It could be sort of unusual but-but..."

The dark dress unfolded in front of them. Crowley looking astonished.

"So?" Aziraphale asked.

"It's perfect... I'm gonna try it now!"

"N-now?!"

"I'll be back in a minute!" He cried out already leaving the room.

Aziraphale wondered what would happen next.

The golden zipper combined with the sparkly serpent eyes of the demon. Of course, the cut of the dress wasn't designed for fitting his current body, but that was ratter easy to fix. Once he wore his new outfit, he just let a little demonic miracle resolute everything. The pointy neckline revealed part of his bust. He posed in front of a mirror with a malefic smile while resting his hands over the curve of his hips. That was it! He realized what exactly would made him irresistible. At the back of the wardrobe there were a pair of black cut out heels.

"Almost..." Crowley murmured. One finger snapping and some of the heels strings turned golden, just like the zipper. "That's it" He hissed "Aziraphale, you just condemned yourself."

A slow sequence of knocks echoed through the whole room. With each sound, Aziraphale's heart bumped as if it was his heart the one that was being hit and not the floor. Crowley arrived at the room balancing his hips as usual, but this time the heat invaded roughly the angel's whole being. The dark silk over the thin stomach, the soft bust, the curvaceous waist. And the tempting zipper delineating his body's profile.

"Today you proved something, Angel," Crowley smirked with his red lips and walked towards Aziraphale "that you do have good taste in fashion, where did you hide it all this last century?"

"You're no fun, Crowley."

"I'm serious, Angel." He gently pulled up Aziraphale by the hand and once he stood up, he leaned forward and whispered to his ear "You look delicious."

"Oh, but look at you, my dear-"

"Girl."

"My dear girl," He said smoothly "you are _so_ hot."

Crowley guided his hands all over his hips and surrounded him in a embrace.

"Yeah, I can be quite arousing," he sighed "but you, Aziraphale, you are divine."

Theirs lips pressed together as if they where just broken halves of one star. With their tongues they drank from each other's mouth, thirsty. Aziraphale moaned lightly when Crowley's fingers found their way into his breasts, pressing, stroking, plunging. The angel's fingertips slide all over the demons back like a warm and needy wave. And the lips played with their wet love. The movements of the hands, the feel of the body pressed against him defeated Crowley's knees and he fell once more, but this time there was someone who caught him.

"I love you, Angel!" He voiced down on his knees.

"I know, my love," He wheezed "but... do you like me this way too?" His eyes dodged Crowley's golden gaze.

"Angel," he said firmly "I love you, I love you all, and yes, I've desired you for so long."

"Then take me."

Aziraphale kisses landed on Crowley's neck, marking it with celestial fire. The angel felt the hungry hands touch and almost scratch his soft bottom and down to his bare legs under the skirt. And he wanted more, more, more! He needed to pull off that dark dress so he could finally smell that subtle perfume of Crowley's nude skin, to taste that scorched essence yet so tempting. But the pleasant hands stopped right before taking off the underwear.

"Is this ok?" Crowley said smoothly "I can stop, we don't have to go this fast if you don't want to, my angel."

"You said you've desired me for so long."

"And there's nothing more true than that, but we can do anything you want, Angel."

"Well..." Aziraphale stepped back while taking off his shoes and untying his skirt "Crowley..." The wait was enough, more than enough. His heart couldn't handle the fear of ever loosing Crowley, the fear of wasting so much time without giving him all the love inside his chest, without telling him all the tender words, without offering his soul and his body in the most graceful way he could find... Aziraphale knew there would be an end, sooner or later everything that began would end too, and he denied to just wait for that moment without living this, because that was what he felt being with Crowley since the very beginning: life. The clothes on the floor. The demon's eyes wide open. Aziraphale closed his eyelids and slowly spread his wings letting his ineffable nature exist in his body. When the angel opened the eyes, Crowley saw the reflection of the galaxies inside the deep blue. "I want you to adore me" and he said that because, in fact, he adored Crowley. Despite the holy echo of his tone, his voice was still so familiar, it was still the voice of his eternal friend, of his dear love; that melted Crowley's heart.

"I'm devoted to you, Aziraphale," He swore as he got closer. The angel unzipped the dress slowly, letting Crowley fill with a yearning for love. They gazed each other's nude body. The demon let his midnight wings to extend. His eyes glowed with infernal fire. "and I will adore you."

Crowley posed a hand over his cheek. Aziraphale stroke through his scintillating red hair. And both ethereal beings fused in a kiss. So tender, so needy, so patient and so urged. They licked their skin. They embraced and rubbed their breasts and their thighs with their own. The feathers tangling. Drinking from each others waters. Swinging their fingers. Rejecting to let the other break off the eternal hug because they felt that there wasn't any more universe but them. Voices whimpering and moaning of pleasure. The burning cold halo in Aziraphale's skin, the glacial heated aura in Crowley's, both blending in the imperfect balance that created their own world. The most consecrated sin ever occurred in history happened that afternoon in that house.

"I love you." Aziraphale whispered once everything ended a while later. He gave Crowley a tiny peck in his forehead before letting the demon cuddle him close in the bed. They fell asleep just to feel the warmth and continue together.

* * *

  
Aziraphale woke up early the next morning. After watching the calmed breath of his beloved demon, he went to cook the breakfast. The happiness colored his gestures and his movements. The world seemed more peaceful, just like the rays of the sun that entered through the window. He was happy that he could be with Crowley after all. The opposite sides, the caution, the fear, the imminent end of the world... nothing broke their unusual bond, obviously a slight crash wouldn't end it neither. They loved each other so much, and that was his favorite thing in existence. Their own side was the most safe place in the universe after all. Crowley's arms hugged his waist.

"The bed feels cold without you, Angel." He sighed.

"You could use another blanket then." He giggled.

"No..." He drowned his face into the angel's hair "I want _your_ warmth."

"Then stay with me."

"Oh, you bet I will," He pressed a kiss into Aziraphale's cheek "you won't get rid of me for the rest of eternity."

"I wonder if you can prove it..."

"You'll see." He smirked as he squeezed lightly the angel's waist before freeing him "By the way, maybe you should wear skirts more often, Angel."

"You like me better this way?"

"No, I like you in any way, but I know that you bought this skirt for a reason and that reason draws an adorable smile in your chubby face."

Aziraphale blushed.  
"Oh dear, you are so nice."

The day was cloudy but, regardless the lack of sunlight, the demon and the angel spent one of the many upcoming days just enjoying their company. Was it similar to the many nice encounters through the centuries? Yes, but it was also different. Now both of them were able to talk and do whatever their messy heart would ask for. 

**Author's Note:**

> I will be posting some sketches at my new IG account if you're curious @messy.crisantemo


End file.
